Tuesday, January 31, 2012

Exploring Friendship

We met the first day of college.  Somehow, it came up in our conversation that she had a car and planned to go home on the weekends.  I planned to go home on the weekends, too, but my car was back home in New York, and I was now living in a dorm in the lovely city of Philadelphia.

After class, I went with her to a cafe and met her mom.  We had a great time, and by the end of the day, I felt like I had known her for years.

Her apartment was only 5 blocks from mine, and we started meeting up in the mornings to go to class together.  Between classes, we would head to Taco House, a little dive of a restaurant that had a huge, $5 lunch special.

On Fridays, we would leave the city after class.  She dropped me off at the train station near her parent's house, which was halfway between Philadelphia and my home.  I would then take a train to NYC followed by a bus to my suburban neighborhood.  On Sunday nights, my dad would drive me 45 minutes to her parents' house, and we would go back to school.

Our sophomore year, I moved to an apartment half a block away from hers.  By that point, we spent all day together.  We went to the same classes, and spent all our spare time at my apartment (sometimes we went to hers, but she lived in a 10'x10' room and I had the bigger place).

We started taking my car after she totaled hers, which worked out better for me because it was quicker than having to take a train and a bus to get homch e.  We shared so much of ourselves with each other on those car rides, and know all each other's secrets.

We've been there for each other through thick and thin, love and breakups, drunken sob fests (where I passed out on her floor on top of a bunch of gummi bears), roommate problems, boyfriend problems, and everything in between.  She loves my kids like they are her nephews and niece, and they call her Auntie Michelle.

Even though we don't spend nearly enough time together anymore because life gets in the way, we're really close.  I only see her 4 or 5 times a year, but we cherish the moments we have together.  We're still just as close as we were when we spent every waking moment together.

I thought I had met a ride home, but I really met my closest friend that fateful first day of college.

This post was written for this week's RemembeRED prompt from Write on Edge. This week, we’d like you to explore friendship. You can talk about a current friendship or one from your past, a friend you met over kindergarten snacks or happy hour at your first job. Examine your emotional interest in the friendship and the role it plays, or played, in your life. The word limit for this prompt is 400 words. 

Write on Edge: RemembeRED

Monday, January 30, 2012

Pizza Party with a Side of Drama

I threw an awesome birthday party for the kids this weekend, although, unfortunately, it ended up being full of drama.  We rented out a pizza restaurant for 2 hours and hired Matty Roxx, an amazing children's entertainer in our area.

Princess wore a brand new poufy pink tutu and new silver shoes, along with a pink furry stole.  She looked precious.  We got the boys, (T and Goober, as well as my nephew) matching outfits.  They all wore black superhero T-shirts and acid washed black jeans.

While I was going nuts baking the night before at my mom's house (2 types of cake pops and a banana cake), she mentioned that my MIL told her that Rick, the kids' grandpa, was coming.  I was annoyed.  First of all, he hasn't seen the kids since Christmas 2010, when he promised them all presents and never followed through.  I don't care that he didn't buy them stuff, but it made me so mad to see my kids disappointed by him.  I was also very irritated that my MIL invited him and didn't tell me.  I have a right to know who will be at my kids' party.

The kids had a ton of fun and Matty put on a great show.  It was nice to be in a place where 12 kids could run wild.

I've written before about how my SIL and I do not get along, at all.  And a lot of the time, I am not the most mature person about it (like Christmas Eve, when I totally ignored her and pretended she wasn't in the room-it was the better option than ruining the holiday)

Well, my MIL took it upon herself to invite my SIL and not tell anyone-not me, not my parents, not my boyfriend.  I was near the door, waiting for my best friend from college to arrive, and instead, my SIL walks in.  I was shocked, and so angry I was shaking.  The first thing out of my mouth was "You weren't invited, so feel free to leave."  I really didn't mean to be mean.  I just got taken off guard and was furious with my MIL.

They both left, and apparently, she told my boyfriend she was going to kick me out of the house-except I'm on the lease and I pay rent.  She can't do that just because she's mad at me.  I'm back home now, and we're avoiding each other like the plague.  I want to be able to explain to her why I said what I did to her daughter, but I don't  think I can without blaming her for overstepping her bounds and inviting her without telling everyone.  It wasn't her party, or her place, to do so.  I hate being the last person to things, and it seems like she always does this.  I thought she learned after the last time, when she invited her daughter and her dogs to stay for a few days at our house and I found out on Facebook.

At least the party was good.  And, I found out my college friend is pregnant, and due 2 months before her wedding.  I am so excited for her!  Now I have baby fever, and I want another one, even though that's crazy and I can't afford it at the moment.

Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Top 10 Life Stories

This week, for Mama Kat's, I chose this prompt: 3.) You know the stories that are retold a million times at family gatherings? I call them Life Stories that you just never live down. List your Top 10 Life Stories.

1. The time my 12-year-old self and 8-year-old sister convinced our Grandma to walk 2 1/2 miles to McDonalds with us in 90 degree weather-in dollar store green and white flip flops.

2. When my sister and I saw an ad in the paper for a guinea pig so we called the number-I pretended to be my mom.  When the lady came to our house with the guinea pig, my parents were so mad, but felt bad the lady got suckered by us so they let us keep it.  It had 5 babies that night.

3. On my first trip to Florida, when I was 4, we went to sea world.  I was a chubby little kid, and I got stuck in the dolphin-shaped stroller.  Staff had to come help pull me out of the damn thing.

4. At my sister's christening, when I was 4, my 2 cousins and I went outside the church to play because we were bored.  We were running in a row-I was in the middle.  My one cousin stopped short, and so did I to avoid him.  My other cousin ran into me and I scraped my knee really bad.  I proceeded to run back into the church, screaming.  My parents were up on the altar with my sister, so I ran up the altar and under the big table in the middle to get to them, in front of everyone there.

5. I had a dance recital when I was 3.  Earlier that day, I had been playing outside and gotten mosquito bites.  I completely stopped onstage, put my had down my tutu and tights, and screamed over and over, "Mommy, Daddy, I'm itchy!"

6. We adopted my sister when I was 4 and traveled to Oregon to get her.  We stayed at someone's house, and my sister was in a baby carrier on their dining room table, crying.  I yelled to my parents that I no longer wanted a sister, and in an attempt to return her, knocked the entire thing off the table onto the floor.  Thank goodness she was strapped in and didn't get hurt.

7.  I was running around the house with a pencil when I was 9 because I didn't want to give it to my parents.  I tried to hide it in the couch as I jumped on it, and stabbed the bottom of my palm, breaking off the pencil point.  You can still see the graphite under my skin today.

8.  I stabbed myself in the foot with a toothpick in high school, and only a little bit was sticking out.  When I pulled it out, I was spurting blood everywhere and started crying.  My dad came downstairs, and all I could manage to say was that my mom would kill me if she saw all the blood I got on the carpet.  We both burst out laughing at how ridiculous that was.

9. When I was really young, I used to pretend to fall down the stairs when people came over to get attention.  I never really got hurt, but no one knew that.

10. I sang in the children's choir at church, and every Christmas and Easter, when the church was packed beyond capacity, I would get overheated and sick and have to either run outside or into the choir room to throw up.  One time I didn't make it and threw up all over myself in front of everyone.

Mama’s Losin’ It

Happy 3rd Birthday to the Princess!

I can't believe Princess is 3 years old today.  Time has just flown by.  Just like with T, I can't remember her being a newborn.  I see the pictures I have and it's crazy to see how much she's grown.

I remember making Chocolate Banana cupcakes for her welcome home/T's first birthday party.  I loved getting adorable outfits for my little girl, since girls are so much more fun to dress than boys.

Princess actually slept in a crib as a baby, and was the only one of my kids to do so.  We moved her to a toddler bed at 11 months, but when I was 9 months pregnant with Goober and our apartment flooded, we had to move really quickly, and she's been sleeping on a couch with her dad since then.

She's always been my little drama queen.  She constantly gets "boo boos" and cries about them until you pay attention to her.  She hates to share, and is incredibly jealous, especially when it comes to daddy.  She also bangs her head on the floor when she's mad-I thought she would have grown out of it by now, but at least we have wall to wall carpeting upstairs.  Princess is definitely the little boss of our house.

When she was about 15 months old, we lived in a little 2 bedroom apartment and had the kitchen gated off because the landlords wouldn't fix the broken cabinets.  Anyway, next to the baby gate, there was a big drawer that we used as a junk drawer.  She somehow got into it one day, and drank an entire air freshener plug in.  The boyfriend called poison control and she was okay after she drank 2 cups of milk.  I will never forget that her breath smelled like flowers for 3 days. You knew she was in the room, even when your eyes were closed.  I thought it was hilarious.

She's my go-to child when I need to run errands.  She'll walk around the stores and really enjoys it.  I've yet to have her throw a tantrum in a store, unless it's because we're leaving and she doesn't want to go home.  If I want to go out to eat, she and I usually go together too.  The boyfriend hates restaurants, so I take her instead.  She's my little buddy.

She's just grown up so fast.  I remember dressing her in itty bitty outfits when she was 6 months old, and now she's 3.  Her Belle Halloween costume sits in my closet, and it's small enough for some dolls to wear.

I don't know what I would do without Princess in my life.  I'm so blessed to have such an amazing daughter, and I adore spoiling her (like buying the entire prarie girl line of clothes at Babies R Us for her today-they are so cute-if you have a daughter, you should totally check them out).

Tuesday, January 24, 2012

Banana Chocolate Cake Pops

T begged me to  make cake pops for his birthday.  I planned on making cupcakes, but who am I to deny the birthday boy?  We went through the cabinets and he picked out banana cake mix.  I decided to use chocolate frosting with it, and they were super good.

I also noticed that the banana cake was more moist than the other cakes I've made for cake pops, so I only had to use 1/2 a container of frosting instead of most of the can.

1 box banana cake mix, made according to package directions
1/2 can of chocolate fudge frosting
2 pounds milk chocolate candy melts
lollipop sticks

-crumble the cake and mix with frosting
-refrigerate for at least 30 minutes, then roll into balls
-dip end of lollipop stick in melted chocolate, then insert halfway through ball
-freeze balls 20-30 minutes
-dip in chocolate and serve when ready

Monday, January 23, 2012

Happy 4th Birthday!

T is 4 today.   It's kind of bittersweet for me.  It feels like I was pregnant with him just yesterday, and now he's not a baby anymore.

I mentioned it in my last post too, but I can't remember T being a newborn.  I vividly remember my awful labor and epidural experience, and I remember them whisking him away a few minutes after he was born to lay under the lights (he was a little bit jaundiced). 

I remember how it was impossible to get him to go to sleep at night.  By this time, I was very pregnant with Princess, and the boyfriend and I would have to rub and tap on his back for hours until he finally fell asleep.  If we stopped, even for a minute, he would start bawling and we would be back at square one.

Once he was comfortable crawling around and standing up on his own, he wasted no time figuring out how to knock the baby gate down so he could get out of the bedroom in the mornings.  We coslept with him, and every morning, I was awakened by the gate crashing to the floor.  The boy's never met a baby gate he couldn't open.

His first birthday was awful.  He felt a little bit warm and was cranky, but we chalked it up to teething and gave him some Tylenol.  He went down for a nap and woke up crying a half hour later.  When I went to get him, he was burning up and had  a seizure.  I have never been so terrified in my life.  By the time we got to the emergency room, he had 3 seizures and his temperature was above 104.   Spending the whole day in the emergency room was terrible for everyone, but thankfully his fever came down and he was okay.

Then there was the time he and the boyfriend were playing and they banged heads.  After I realized T was okay, I noticed that the boyfriend wasn't.  He was sprawled on the floor, completely out of it.  By the time the paramedics came, he was out cold, and stayed that way for the better part of an hour.  T was about 14 months old at this time, and he and the boyfriend both ended up getting CT scans.  T was fine, the boyfriend had a nasty concussion.  He'd kill me if he knew I told the bloggy universe that his son knocked him out.

T also knocked Princess out when he was 2 and she was 1.  He has a hard head and likes to give head injuries.  My daughter turned into Linda Blair in the Exorcist, and I swear, there was puke on my ceiling.  After more CT scans after a trip to the ER in a blizzard, she had a concussion and he was fine.

He was diagnosed with apraxia when he turned 3 and started with a new speech teacher through the school district.  She was the one who made a breakthrough and got him to say his first word, "ball."  I was so proud of him I almost cried.  After 3 long years, my son finally talked.  Now he chatters constantly and part of me misses the days when he was quieter.

I look back on all the strides he's made and I can only imagine what he will be able to do this year.  He's brought so much light to my life and I can't imagine what I ever did without him.  Happy birthday to my baby, T, who isn't a baby anymore. 

Sunday, January 22, 2012

The Year is Not Going as I Planned

I've been so lazy about blogging since the holidays.  I can't seem to get inspired enough to write, and being sick for an entire week totally threw me off. 

I've still only gone to the gym once, and now my parents reneged on watching 2 of my kids to give me a chance to go because my sister decided to go back to school.  She's starting a nursing program this week, so they have to watch her son while she's at school.  I don't know why she decided to go to community college where I live, because she lives an hour and a half away.  It just kind of puts a damper on things for me, because sometimes I need the help, and now they have to watch my nephew every day.  T is going to be pretty bummed out too, because now he can't go there after school for a few hours every day like he's used to.

Speaking of T, he's turning 4 on Monday, and Princess is turning 3 on Wednesday.  I can't believe how fast they're growing up.  It feels like they were little just yesterday, but I honestly can't remember either of them being babies, which is weird.  I can remember Goober as a baby, but maybe that's because he's the youngest.  Thinking about this makes me want another baby, even though I know that is crazy and not possible at the moment.

The boyfriend needs to get a real job, as the internet thing he was working on doesn't seem to be panning out.  He was doing well until he decided to have other people help, and everything went to crap.  He doesn't seem to care that I'm maxing out all my credit cards just to pay for food, and I'm going to have to borrow money again just to pay our share of the rent this month.  I'm really getting sick of him not caring enough to get a job.  He knows that if worse came to worse, our families would bail us out so we had food and a place to live, so he's in no rush to get a job. 

Since the stupid Star Wars computer game came out a few weeks ago, that's all he's been doing in his waking hours.  He wears headphones and plays the damn game.  He can't even hear if the kids are screaming 2 feet away from him.  I have to tap him on the shoulder and yell if I need his help for anything, and that pisses him off because then he gets killed in his game.  I tried to talk to him about it, but he doesn't seem to get it or care, and it's not fair.  If he's home and not working, why the hell can't he help a little with the kids, or take out the trash, or clean up his dirty dishes?  I wish I knew a way to knock some sense into him.

On a better note, I decided to start a makeup blog as well.  You can find it here.  I only have a couple posts up now, but I'm planning to swatch a bunch of makeup if I can find a working camera, and post looks of the day.

I hope this coming week will go well.  I'm bringing cookie cake to school for T's birthday on Monday, so I hope the kids in his class have fun.  I'm also having a party for T and Princess next Saturday.  I invited his whole class, and even though the RSVP date was yesterday, I've only heard from 7 out of 17 kids.  I hope some more parents call me tomorrow, since we kind of spent a lot of money for the party (we're having a musician who does an interactive show with the kids-my kids saw him when we were pumpkin picking and loved him).

Tuesday, January 17, 2012

Tagline for my Life

Little Girl Lost, Woman Found: One Woman's journey from idyllic childhood to the depths of addiction and back, finding her purpose in motherhood.

This was written in response to this week's RemembeRED prompt from Write on Edge.  Imagine your life, or a part of your life, as a title and tagline.  That's it.

Write on Edge: RemembeRED

Thursday, January 12, 2012

So Startled I Mom-Failed

I'm linking up to Mama Kat's today with prompt 2.) Describe a  time you felt startled.

This is also the story of my guiltiest moment as a mom.  I've contemplated telling it before, but always changed my mind.

I absolutely hate when anything or anyone touches my feet.  It freaks me out.  I don't do pedicures, I don't do foot massage, I scream at my kids when they do it to try to get a rise out of me.

One morning, I was taking a nap.  My leg must have been hanging off the edge of the bed.  I was woken up by something touching my foot.  I freaked, and kicked at it, assuming it was one of my cats.

It was my son.  Turns out I kicked him square in the mouth.  I felt awful.  He was crying and complaining that his mouth hurt, but there was no blood, so I thought it would get better in a few days.

Wrong again.  A couple days later, I noticed that one of his top teeth (not the front tooth, the one next to it) had broken off at his gumline.   I quickly called the pediatric dentist in a panic and he came in on a Sunday to see T.

It turns out T needed to get his 4 top teeth taken out.  Because I accidentally kicked him in the face.  Can you say epic mom fail?

His teachers and stuff have asked me what happened to his teeth, and I can only bring myself to tell them that he had an accident.  I still feel awful about it, but he's pretty comfortable and happy, even without the teeth.

Toothless T with his Nana

Mama’s Losin’ It

Sunday, January 8, 2012

A Not So Great Start to the New Year

I've been promising myself that I would start blogging more regularly since the holidays are over, but that hasn't happened so far.

I've been dealing with a very cranky 15 month old who is getting 3 molars in at once.  I swear, the kid's only sleeping for an hour or two at a time, and only after I dose him with Ibuprofen.  He's been so uncomfortable, he's been chewing through binkies.  My other kids never did that.

I also decided I was totally sick of taking the medication I've been on for the past few months because of the weight gain it caused, so I stopped taking it, which has really thrown my body for a loop (not a doctor approved stop but I don't really care).

In the past 3 months, even though my eating habits haven't changed much, I've gained 20-30 pounds, all in my stomach.  I look 4 months pregnant, and it's embarrassing.  Since I'm poor, my mother had to buy me a whole new wardrobe of shirts, because I only fit into 2 maternity shirts and nothing else.  Jeans that were so big I could barely even wear them with a belt are now so tight they won't button.  I've had enough.

Even though I've only been to the gym once since I got my membership, I'm motivated to go, and I'm signing up for a few personal training sessions so I'm less intimidated by the machines and don't hurt myself (I have a history of working out too hard in my college days, leading to a 3-finger sized tear in an abdominal muscle that led to 6 weeks of complete bedrest).

I've also had crazy insomnia since I stopped the medication.  It's only the 3rd day, but I've had 45 minutes of sleep in the past 24 hours.  I feel so odd and awake and giddy.  It's really bizarre.  I finally fell asleep but my daughter woke up crying from her nap, and after I moved her to her room (she was so tired she fell asleep on a chair in front of the TV), and realized I felt totally awake again and will not be able to fall asleep anytime soon.

I hope I can get back into the swing of things soon.

Friday, January 6, 2012

Help a Kitty in Need

I haven't gotten as many posts up as I wanted to so far this year, but I thought this was important.

A girl I know is fostering a diabetic kitty named Ghost, and she needs help with the funds to get him to the vet and get him insulin.

Please consider donating even just a few dollars to help him.

Her post about him can be found here.

Thank you all in advance!   I am a sucker for cats and can't donate myself because I'm saving money to get my pregnant cat spayed (and it is really expensive where I live, even the low-cost option).

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Wordless Wednesday- Happy Kids and a Crazy Cat on Christmas

Our tree
Princess' Computer
T and his Bat Cave (don't mind his pants-he hates staying dressed)
Goober just ran around in circles all day
Baby Cat (aka Little Fart) trying to attack a Fur Real Friends cat

Monday, January 2, 2012

Getting to Know Me

I saw this at Mommy Monologues (she got it from Theta Mom) and I knew I had to do it.  I love answering things like this, and reading them about others.

1. Name someone with the same birthday as you. King Henry VIII 

2. What has been your favorite age so far? 24, 25, 26, 27, because I love being a mom and can't imagine my life without my kids.

3. Where did you meet your husband? He's my boyfriend, and we met at a friend's house when I was staying there.
4. How many children do you have? 3

5. Have you ever sung in front of a large number of people? Yes, I sang with a choir for Pope John Paul II when he came to NY in 1995.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about your preferred sex? I like a good personality, but the first thing I noticed about my boyfriend the night we met was his nose.
7. What really turns you off? Assholes, superficial jerks, and people who don't like kids and treat them like poorly behaved puppies.

8. What do you order at Starbucks? Grande nonfat iced raspberry white mocha, no whip.

9. What is your biggest mistake? Doing drugs, and staying in a relationship with someone who liked doing drugs for as long as I did because I lost over 5 years of my life, hurt friends and family, ruined my teeth, and destroyed my short-term memory.

10. As a child, what did you want to grow up to be? When I was 3, I wanted to be an executioner (I am not kidding, it is on video, lol).  But for most of my childhood, either a vet or a trauma surgeon.

11. Say something totally random about yourself.  I am addicted to Cheddar Chex Mix.  I eat it every night and feel the need to run to the store and buy more when I am down to my last bag so I don't ever run out.

12. Do you still watch kiddie movies or TV shows? Yes.  I love Disney movies, especially princess movies.  I enjoy Power Rangers Samurai a little too much, and also watch Imagination Movers, Spongebob, iCarly, and Wow Wow Wubbzy with my kids.  

13. Did you have braces? Yes, I hated them and forced the orthodontist to take them off early. Then I never wore my retainer, so my teeth looked worse after braces than before.

14. Favorite Social Network? Facebook

15. What is the most romantic thing someone of the preferred sex has done for you? I was proposed to (by my ex) when we were at Disney World.  We had a private dinner on a balcony with our own waiter.  Then I got dessert, and on the plate was a glass slipper with a ring in it.  As soon as I got the plate, fireworks started.  It was pretty cool.

16. When do you know when it’s love? When the boyfriend and I stayed together after getting arrested and spending 2 days in jail a few days after we started dating.  We knew it was love when that incident didn't break us up.

17. Do you speak any other languages? I could speak German when I was a kid-now I can usually understand it, but I can't speak it.  I also used to be fluent in French, but I am a little rusty.

18. Have you ever been to a tanning salon? No, I am so pale I glow in the dark and I like it that way.
19. What magazines do you read? Good Housekeeping, Family Fun, Rachael Ray, and Women's Day.

20. What is playing on your iPod right now? I don't have an iPod.  But I do like CDs, and I listen to Stevie Nicks and the Les Miserables soundtrack in my car.  I also have Pandora on my phone and laptop, and I listen to dubstep on that.

21. Have you ever ridden in a limo? No, I have an irrational fear of limos and I will never ever in my life set foot in one of those death traps.

22. Has anyone you were really close to passed away? My Oma died in 2007 and my Grandma died in 2011.  I also lost my husky Tiko in 2007, 3 days after the birth of my first son, and it was devastating (and it still hurts the most).

23. Do you watch MTV? Yeah, I watch Jersey Shore and Teen Mom 2.  And I love watching True Life.

24. What’s something that really annoys you? When the boyfriend wears headphones while he's playing games on the computer and the real world ceases to exist.  All 3 kids can be crying and I will be screaming his name and he doesn't hear a damn thing.  Oh, and when he doesn't take the garbage out.

25. Which television show you were sad to say goodbye to? Lost
26. Can you dance?  I was in the ballroom dancing club in high school.  But no, not unless I want to look like a fool.

27. What’s your favorite place in the world? The house upstate, in the Catskills.  I love it so much there.  If I thought I had half a chance in hell of my dad letting me live there year round, I would beg him every day.
28. Have you ever been rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room? Yes, a couple weeks after my botched epidural when I was in so much pain I was stuck in the fetal position on the bathroom floor. 

29. If you could meet anyone (dead or alive) who would it be? Catherine of Aragon or Queen Anne for real people.  But my top choice would be Anne Rice's Lestat.

30. If you could change one thing in the world for your child, what would it be? I would make sure there were no bullies.  I am terrified that one of my babies will get bullied in school like I was.

Your turn:  If you’re up for the challenge, ask a question in the comments that you would like to know more about and I’ll do my best to answer it.  Or do this question thing yourself and leave your link in the comments!